flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
