Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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