You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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