How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize