no you cant smoke seaweed
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"