if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
