it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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