I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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