Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize