Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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