No awkward lesbian experiences without me
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
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