we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
