at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
