Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
