we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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