Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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