His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize