Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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