would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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