please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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