u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
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