I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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