if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
