Nicole vs. Life
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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