Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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