That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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