Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
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worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
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Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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