i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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