I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
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I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
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I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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