You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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