I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
