wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
is it fun? or sober?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
