You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
