toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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