I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Dear god my vagina.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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