nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
