woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
organizing the empties. That sober.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Randomize
