We're like a lot better than the average bears
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
