just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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