you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
