Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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