he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
