I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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