You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Randomize
