Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Oh god it's open bar.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
