I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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