and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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