Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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