She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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