You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
