Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
